Therapy for
Entrepreneurs

One of the hardest things human beings do in life is make decisions, and that is your primary task. Making important decisions is what it means to own your own business or run one for someone else. Your job is to choose, and those choices will create the future, not just for you, but for everyone involved. It is a daunting responsibility. No one else is accountable, and you are expected to get things right. The risk of getting it wrong is why you are awake at three in the morning. This is especially pernicious because it paralyzes you. Taking no action at all can seem safer than taking the wrong path.

Failure comes with more than just criticism. Failure comes with disaster. If you fail, you will not only lose a job, company, and money. No, you will lose your status in your community. Your failure will be seen by your colleges, your friends, and your family. The humiliation of losing your business will show everyone how much of a failure you are. You fear you will be dishonored and destroyed. Your dreams will be dead. I felt this keenly in my role as a CEO. I knew, not feared, knew, that if I failed, this would happen to me. Spoiler Alert: When the Board wanted to go in a different direction, none of that happened to me.

Many people have a nightmare of being naked in public. Feeling foolish is a big fear for many of us. In a world where criticism is swift and very public thanks to the internet, the higher your profile the greater the risk of looking foolish becomes. Your reputation is vital for success. It is so easy to misspeak, so easy to make any small error that makes you look stupid. You want to impress your peers, the public, and your employees. Appearing foolish undermines years of goodwill in moments. You can agonize over ways to avoid it. It is easy to rage at subordinates who make you look dumb. Fear of looking foolish has driven many leaders into even worse situations and actions, just to avoid that appearance.

You made a commitment to spend more time with your spouse and your family. Weekly date night is a distant memory. The day starts early and you are back at work after dinner. Your business depends on you, and there is always something else that needs your attention. There is a flood of information for you to wade through, though at times it is more like swimming because it is a flood ten feet deep. Getting exercise is something that happens when you “have the time to get around to it” and of course, you never have the time. The same may apply to time with your spouse. When was the last time you were intimate?

The greatest stressor of owning your own business is the weight of leadership. There are others who are relying on your decisions and your actions for more than directives. The very lives of others are directly affected by the choices that you make. The worst thing I ever do is let someone go because of money. An employee who has done everything asked but still loses the job rips at my heart. Running a business means you will change the lives of people and sometimes it is not going to be for the better. That cannot be helped. Being in charge means the outcome of that change rests on your shoulders. You feel guilty for the employees you had to let go, knowing they have their own lives to live, their own hopes and dreams which you just disrupted. Even your demeanor and mood are critical. Come into the office downcast in the morning, and the effects will ripple out before everyone is finished with their coffee. You feel the pressure to be positive and maintain morale, even if your own is sliding.